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 Praying
is deeply personal and that's why sharing it has such power. If
you have a problem in your relationship that you can't get past,
try praying about it and asking for help from another, unseen source.
Your ability to ask and communicate in any form has the power to
open doors within you. According to research it even elevates your
immune system. An open, sincere and clean heart has it's own
power. Anyone who has one knows what I'm talking about, because
they've seen how that works in their own life and relationship.
You can pray on your own about your relationship or with your partner,
if you're comfortable.. If you pray with your partner, you can both
marshal that power and surrender to what feels too overwhelming
and get out of your own way.
 I
am getting married in a month and am very much in love with my fiancée,
but I can't help from feeling empty, even when I am with him. Am
I wrong about how I am feeling about him?
We all carry emptiness inside of us. It's part of the human condition.
Running from emptiness, trying to fill it with people, places and
things, is one of the surest ways to guarantee that we will feel
forever empty. Denying the emptiness within us only makes it grow.
By acknowledging and confronting this feeling, you're opening the
door to filling that empty space with what we might call spiritual
energy. In
twelve-step rooms we talk about a God-shaped hole, in other
words an internal emptiness that only God can fill. This is an inside
job. No relationship can fill that God-shaped hole and when we try
to make it, we set ourselves up for disappointment and loneliness.
Two whole people coming together to share this experience of life
have a far better chance at a successful relationship than two half
people who are trying to fill the void in themselves with the other.
How do I know if this is the man I want to spend my life with when
I don't even know myself?
Life is a risk. Marriage or long-term partnership is, to some extent,
a leap of faith. There are no guarantees. All we can do is muster
our best resources in the form of love, a positive attitude, a firm
commitment and a faith in life. These are the tools, the weapons
and the comforts we take forward in life when we say
"I do." One would think that the better we know ourselves, the
better choice we make, andthat is true. But most marriages that
are long-term have gone through darkness, light, challenge, failure
and success and those couples have used the relationship to better
get to know themselves. Self-knowledge deepens relationship understanding
and relationship understanding deepens self-knowledge. Relationships
are one of our most powerful vehicles for retaining self-knowledge.
More Q&A's From Tian
June 19,2000
Enlightenment
Connecting with the
soul
June 12,2000
Conquering fear
Self image
Buddhism
June 5,2000
Inner wisdom
Grouchy and impatient
Self Improvement
Blushing
Meditation
Choosing the right
friends
May 22,2000
Being in the moment
A spiritual path
A haunting past
Spirituality in a
relationship
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