|
 Inner
wisdom is exactly what it sounds like, wisdom that comes from within.
Creating quiet time when you can be calm and go within is critical
to developing inner wisdom, which is really less cognitive than
it sounds. If you’re serious about developing inner wisdom, here
are a few things you can do. Set aside time every day to calm down
and be with yourself in an unhurried manner. Learn to meditate.
Also, avoid running yourself ragged. Don’t value external factors
so much that you ignore your inner world. Enjoy the journey!
 I’m
only 35 and lately I’ve noticed that I’m grouchy and impatient with
my friends. I’d almost prefer being alone. Is this a sign of selfishness?
There
can be a lot of reasons for your grouchiness and impatience with
others. Is there some deeper anxiety or frustration that you’re
projecting onto your friends that needs your attention? Is your
love life and/or career causing frustration and making you lash
out a little? What’s going on that needs your attention? Your inner
world can be like a small child tugging at your pants’ leg if you
ignore it for too long. Talk this out with a friend and make use
of the chats and other resources on Love Track.. Allow yourself
more time to relax and do the things you really enjoy.Create down
time to reduce stress and enhance calm and see if that helps. If
your problem is more serious, look for support groups or professional
help.
I
want to better understand and improve myself. What is the best way
to go about that?
Start
now. Breathe deeply in and out several times and allow yourself
to sink into the moment and experience your body in space quietly
with the world surrounding you. Tune in to your own inner world.
Pay attention to your thoughts as they pass through your mind..
Notice how many times you want to react, control or get involved
with your thinking processes. Don’t. Simply witness. This is where
it begins. When you learn to tune in to the contents of your inner
world, you will discover an understanding of your own behavior and
the choices you’ve made in your own life. Then you can apply what
you know to those around you. Relationships develop along with self-improvement.
Ask yourself what hobbies, people or growth activities you are drawn
to and explore getting involved with them. Develop the attitude
of a seeker, understanding that we are here to learn. We are travelers
through this world on a journey that has no beginning or end.
I’m
easily embarrassed. If a conversation suddenly seems to focus on
me, I turn crimson and then feel like I’m somehow guilty of something.
I feel this is a sign of weakness. What do you think?
Your
tendency to blush and feel unworthy could be just normal shyness
in the spotlight. On the other hand, you may be reactivating painful
feelings from childhood traumas or moments when you have felt powerless.
However, embarrassment is not a sign of weakness. Think about the
reason. Were you criticized too much as a child and did it make
you feel deficient? Or, did you get more than your share of the
spotlight, so now you feel guilty for getting the attention—as if
you are doing something wrong, manipulating or wanting it too much
and your reaction is guilt? Did you experience school trauma--freezing
in class when you were called on to supply an answer and your mind
went blank? We are all individuals with reasons for feeling and
acting the way we do. Determining the source of your feelings is
the first step to resolving your difficulty. ?
I’m intrigued by meditation. What is it
and how is it done? Do I have to sit with my legs crossed and recite
a mantra to meditate correctly?
Meditation is one of the best self-help tools we can use to give
our stressed-out minds the rest they need to function well. Practiced
regularly, meditation helps many people achieve a balance that helps
them in many ways, from maintaining successful, intimate relationships
to dealing with standing in a long grocery line. Through meditation
we can “witness” our own mental processes and better understand
what’s going on in our own minds. It teaches us how to use breath
to calm our nervous systems and get our minds connected with our
bodies. The best way to get started is to get some simple instruction
on how to meditate. Join a class, buy a tape or find a friend who
can teach you. The sitting position can be simple, perhaps in a
chair if you can elongate your spine comfortably. Saying a mantra
helps, but you can start by using a word like “peace” if you wish.
How can I decide
who in my life is bad for me?
If people lead you into activities, behavior or thinking patterns
that aren’t constructive, you may wish to consider whether or not
they are good for you. Time is precious and good company can help
to stimulate us toward right thinking and action. Attitude is central
to a positive or negative experience of life, and having people
in our lives who share and encourage a good attitude can be very
helpful.
More Q&A's From
Tian
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